Originally posted on EzineArticles.com:
The struggles we all face throughout our lives all have the power to define us. Each trial has the potential to make us strong or to create a scar that never fully gets healed. So, what is it that decides if you will see yourself as a survivor or a victim? It turns out that while there are some who seem to have greatness sewn into their DNA and personality, it is possible to teach yourself to thrive even in the most difficult of times.
Here are some essentials to being the one to rise above.
Resilience
Resilience is the power to adapt in the face of adversity and is often named as the single most important factor in overcoming hardship. One of the keys to building your resilience is to become as resourceful a problem solver as you can. Instead of seeing the problem or trauma as something negative and something that is standing in your way, resilient people will instead look for a way to improve their situation.
Turning to problem solving instead of worrying (or worse, complaining) is one of the best ways to come through an issue in your life stronger and wiser rather than bruised and battered. It allows you to focus on something other than the problem itself and assures you that you are in control of your life. And, once you discover the solution, it is less likely that you will ever be in a situation to encounter the same hardship again.
It’s About Routines
For many of us, it is very difficult to move on after we have been hurt or traumatized in some way. When we go through a trying time and do make it through the other side, our instinct is to take time to reflect. But, those who are able to bounce back the fastest are usually those who try to return to their normal routine and rhythm as soon as possible.
In order to do that, you need to make sure that you have a routine to begin with. Have a life that you enjoy that is full of loving people, a meaningful career and hobbies that make you happy and it will be easier to step back into this world after you go through a difficult time. Don’t allow your happiness to revolve around one thing. That way you will always have other outlets to help you through difficult times even if a major part of your life comes to an end.
Own Your Suffering
While it is important to find a way to move on from suffering, it is also essential that you first work through any questions or feelings that you might be having about the situation. No matter how far down you might try to push those feelings, they will find ways to resurface and affect your life if you don’t take the time to understand them and make the choice of how you are going to view your past.
They say that we all alter our memories in some way. This is why eye-witness accounts are frequently found not to be the most reliable source. We change details and only remember certain pieces. When you take the time to reflect on difficult times, you make the choice of how you will hold that moment in your memory. A bad break up can become a new beginning instead of a loss or a scary situation could have the ability to make you more fearless in the future.
It’s easy to believe that some are born resilient are some are just not, but this train of thought lends no hope to you as you struggle. Every human being, including you, has the power within to become resilient and recover after a life of struggle.
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